Irreplaceable...

My heart wept when told that Ayahanda was proud of us in terms of willingness to serve him, support RasululLah's cause, adab and above all sharing his genuine concern for the Ummah - Ummati, Ummati, Ummati. We will strive to make Ayahanda proud by sharing all that he has taught us but it would never be the same because he will forever be irreplaceable. Allahummaghfirlahu warhamhu...

Till We Meet Again, Ayahanda…

On 9 Mar 2017 at 9:47 AM (10 JamadilAkhir 1438H), my spiritual father returned to his Lord after being in a state of coma since 6 Mar 2017 (5 JamadilAkhir 1438H) due to haemorrhage stroke, bleeding in his left brain.

It was his second stroke since 2006, then there was bleeding in his right brain. He had refused surgery then and lived to teach hundreds, if not thousands (AlhamdulilLah! I was one of those lucky and privileged ones when I was introduced to him in 2009 by another of my beloved teachers), of lost souls seeking for authentic guidance, returning to the One and Only Lord.

At a time, when any sane human being would opt for surgery in order to prolong one’s life (out of fear for the ultimate – death!), Ayahanda chose Taqwa ilalLah - to have faith in Allah’s Qada’ and Qadr and redha with His plans for him.

I seek your continuous supplications for this beloved teacher of mine (and many who hold him dear to his heart, his memory etched deeply in our minds for eternity) for here stood a man, a rare gem, whose disposition reflected his principles and complete submission to Ad-Deen-ul-Islam.

He spoke from his heart and his compassion, earnestness, generosity, patience, as well as sincerity touched the hearts of others while his quick wit and sharp mind left many going, “I never thought of it that way!” and kept many a mind awake post lessons, pondering on what was taught, appreciative of his immense experience and in-depth knowledge of the Deen.

Gazing at his serene face before his journey to his resting place and witnessing the sea of people who attended his swolat jenazah, I am confident that al-marhum will be under the best of care in 'alam barzakh. For those he left behind (albeit temporarily), there is a deep void. May Allah SWT keep his family and students under His Care and Protection and guide us to those 'Ulama al-'amilin whom please Allah SWT and they, in turn, are pleased with Him (submitting to His will).

And may his students be in a capacity, bi-iznilLah, to continue his legacy – Da’wah (inviting mankind to Islam) and Islah (reforming Muslims) with wisdom – such that we attain mardhatilLah, aamiin yaa Allah!

Patience

Mum's advice - "If you hurt others, have the strength to apologize, and if others hurt you, have the strength to forgive. The people who test your patience are a blessing; without them, you cannot practise patience. Through the depths of pain, Allah SWT elevates the status of the believer. So bear your struggles with patience and prayer. Beautify your patience with silence, supplication and tears."

Indeed, the believers look for excuses. So keep the mask of silence for words are knives that can be thrown back at you. I end today's post with the quote from Sayyidina Ali Abi Talib RA, "Never explain yourself to anyone, because the one who likes you would not need it and the one who dislikes you will not believe it."

Arigato Santaro

A sudden craving by a dear friend mentioned via a random chat resulted in us ending up at Santaro (that's what friends are for)! Great food, greater company, meaningful conversation, alhamdulilLah for such perpetual blessings.

Rhetoric Too Late?

Was listening in on what John Kerry said about the two-state solution via the news. Am not one to comment on politics but the sense is that such rhetoric came too late. What follow-up action (based on the outlined theory) can constructively take place as the current president and administration prepares to exit in a few days? With God's condemnation of the rebellious nation who, in theory, is the 'chosen nation' (a claim they take pride in so do not insult their 'intelligence'), it points to a deeper state - that of a diseased self. Wa-Allahu a'lam. Please continue to du'a for Palestine.

Pieces of 2016

Returned to work after the long holiday amidst news of the demise of George Michael. I recalled the beautiful cover he did (profound lyrics); it seems that we don't get such wonderful melody and meaningful lyrics anymore... Through life's loss or separation, what remains constant is the feelings of knowing. That would suffice. When Allah SWT loves you, He places the love of you in the hearts of people whose love is worth having. So honor the guests of your heart and make supplications for those who linger in there.

O Patchi

AlhamdulilLah! I fell in love with Patchi last year during Umrah and was looking forward to meet it again. This week, my cravings have been satisfactorily satiated, thanks to a kind soul (eternally grateful!). I'm hooked for life :)

First Love

True. If I may loosely translate the quote (I hope I did justice such that the essence of the meaning was not lost in translation) - "Now and then, you think that it is easier to love everyone than to forget that one person; If there is that certain someone who already touched the core of your heart, those who succeed him/her are only touching possibility"

Walimah

AlhamdulilLah! The 4th of Zulkaedah 1435H (30 Aug 2014) was the matrimonial of my beloved cousin (adikQu) at Al-Muttaqeen mosque (such an apt name/place for this lovely young couple)! I'm so elated in sharing the happiness of the extended family. BarakalLahulakuma wa barakah 'alaykuma wa jama'ah bainakuma bil khayr (sakinah, mawaddah wa rahmah), aamiin Allahumma aamiin! ❤

Eid Mubarak

"TaqabbalalLahu minna wa minkum, shiyamana wa shiyamakum. Ja’alanalLaahu minal aidin wal faizin wal maqbulin.”

"May Allah accept our deeds and yours, our fasting and yours. And may Allah make us amongst those who return to purity, granted glory and are accepted."

“Semoga Allah menerima amalan kami dan kamu, puasa kami dan kamu. Dan semoga Allah menjadikan kami dan kamu termasuk dalam golongan orang-orang yang kembali (dari perjuangan Ramadhan) sebagai orang yang diberi kemenangan and diberkati (diterima olehNya).”

160614

Came across this quote by 'Unknown'. How apt, to start the week :)

Walimah

I bumped into this male artist when I was at the lift lobby of Hotel Oberoi in Madina al-Munawwarah 2 years ago. My first impression of him close-up - kalem (Javanese for calm/serene personality).

AlhamdulilLah, one of his prayers have been answered by Allah SWT. BarakalLahulakuma wa barakah ‘alaikuma wa jama’a bainakuma bil khair (sakinah, mawaddah wa rahmah), amin ya Rabb!  

Hayaa'

I was talking to my cousin and I'm reminded of this podcast about QS Al-Qasas 28:23-25. In essence, it speaks about the believing women and how they engage the outside world with confidence (handling themselves well). On the other hand, their quality of shyness (standards of hayaa') was equally evident. May the Muslimah of today manifest these beautiful qualities, aamiin ya Rabb!

P/S: A birthday shout out to aunt Sofie! :)

Purity of Love

Of late, more Malaysian production houses are producing programmes with a religious theme, which is commendable (albeit the fact that I'm uncomfortable with the commercialisation aspect of things!). Nonetheless, I happened to catch this show - about a Chinese lad who fell in love with a Muslimah, amidst various challenges but with time, Allah SWT cleared the path for them, alhamdulilLah! It brought back the past, just that mine had a different twist, alhamdulilLah ala kulliy haal...

Do Not Despair

Today, I’m reminded of Hadith Qudsi where Allah’s mercy prevails over His wrath. And that we are never to have Ablasa (despair), a trait of Iblis; rather to have Raja' (hope) and adopt the Adamic disposition - upon making an error of judgment, to hasten towards repentance, return to Allah SWT  seeking His forgiveness. 

“O Allah! It is Your mercy that I hope for, so do not leave me in charge of my affairs even for a blink of an eye and rectify for me all of my affairs. None has the right to be worshipped except you. O Allah! You have placed upon us an enemy who can see our privacy and our shortcomings, whereas he and his kind spy upon us from places which we are unable to see them. O Allah! Disappoint their hopes towards us, just as You have made them disappointed in hoping to get Your Mercy (Blessings). Make them despair (in attaining their plans) towards us, just as You made them despair from seeking Your Forgiveness. Keep them away (distance) from us, just as You made them to be far-away (distance) from Your Paradise. Verily, You (O Allah) is Most Powerful over everything.” Aamiin ya Rabb!

Zul Ilyas

Spending time with the extended family has always been great. I especially love hanging out with my lil cousin Ilyas (isn't he such an angel in the photo above?). Today, he cried for not being able to play Pictureka with me as I went to grandma's rather late (he was about to go home). At the end of the day, a kiss on his head, a light squeeze of his hand and the comforting words of "don't cry, you're a big boy now right?" did the trick. Next week, I promise, ok lil fella?

Hmm, it may seem odd to the rest of the extended family that the eldest granddaughter can bond so well with the youngest grandson! To be honest, kids sometimes just need some attention and someone whom they can have an intelligent conversation with (they are like sponges that absorb and hold on to your every word!). Sometimes parents or the older siblings are distracted with other pre-occupation to give them that time. In my mind, occupying them with digital gadgets is convenient but what kids truly need is that enriching human interaction.

There is a saying, "The greatest gift you can bestow upon your child is your time and undivided attention". Indeed, it is not what you leave for your child (material), but it is what you leave in him (character). And to develop good character needs constant parent-child connection. Wa-Allahu a'lam.

Realisation

I can't help but post this photo of Hamzah Yusuf next to Johhny Depp. Besides the fact that these are two good looking men, the photo actually reminded me of dad. When I was very young, I used to be amazed at how dad could artfully snip/shave his moustache, soul patch/mouche and goatee/beard - he looked good. And I recall how he would nuzzle me a goodnight kiss (it tickled!). The more I look at the photo above, the more I realise that I actually adore the soul patch/mouche, uhuh... that inverted triangle just below the bottom lip. I think its charming on a gentleman :)

Grandma

Hearing the story from mum - how grandma was weeping, reluctant to leave her brother's hospital bed, made me weep inside. It pains me to imagine what she is going through...

Its just been less than 6 months since she lost her husband... and I could sense that although she puts on a brave and happy front (as though everything is ok now), the vision of her weeping as she kissed her husband for the very last time stuck in my head. I can't imagine, being with someone for more than 60 years and then to find yourself alone.

And now, the thought of her elder brother leaving her seems too much for her 78 year old frame to bear. O Allah! Bestow upon her the courage and patience in this time of trial, aamiin ya Rabb!

Kudos

AlhamdulilLah! Heartwarming to know that one of our brothers has decided to change for the better. May Allah SWT keeps him on the Straight Path and may his contributions benefit the Ummah, aamiin ya Rabb! I'll end this short post with a song I really like (back then), written by another brother, Taufik Batisah, and sung by Hady Mirza - simple melody, accompanied by meaningful lyrics, sung with deep sense of sincerity... and have you seen the video on dzikr? Subhaana-Allah! Go google it :)

Heroes

Masya-Allah! Just last week, on 1 Rabi'ul Akhir, the extended family welcomed the great news from cousin Adni on the arrival of her baby boy Muhammad 'Aqil Darwisy. And today just before swolat zohor, another cousin, Hidayat, welcomed his firstborne, also a baby boy, soon-to-be-named (I hope 'Said' is a name up for consideration... I miss grams alooooooooot). O Allah! Love them and love those who love them, aamiin Allahumma aamiin! Can't wait to meet these lil fellas, Luqman's playmates :)

P/S: A birthday shout out to Ryan in Canada... I've not forgotten you ;P